I noticed a referral to my entry about public transport from an interestingly titled site - manchestertransportsucks.blogspot.com. No guesses what they blog about. Nice of them to add a link back to my blog. If only thy knew that I work on the National Rail Enquiries site.

Anyway, on their site, I found a link to a much more interesting site called www.traindelays.co.uk. Basically, they assist you in getting compensation for delayed and cancelled trains. And when I say assist, I mean it. Rather than you having to fill in a form and send if off, simply sign up, submit your details and let them take care of it all. Nice.

###Section 25 - Hole in One Cover
We will pay You up to £100 for customary bar expenses you incur as a result of, and
immediately subsequent to, You achieving a hole in one during a competition round.

Brilliant. Just goes to show that it pays to read the small print. Well, it would if I played golf!

I can’t get angry with the cyclists. They are doing the right thing. However, the council is not; with no provision for cycle lanes in an area with 50mph speed limits on unlit roads. I am not as brave as them.

The more sensible option would be to take public transport or to combine cycling with public transport. I want to do the right thing - cut back on the carbon emmisions and get a bit fitter.

So, let’s look at the options with regards to time and to cost. It’s hard to work out the cost of the car as there are obvious running costs, but let’s ignore this and just look at petrol costs.

### Travelling By Car
To get to the office for 9am, requires about 1 hour travel. I tend to get in before 8am to speed up the journey, but this still takes 45 minutes. If I get in for 7am, I can do it in 30 minutes, but I don’t really wish to start work so early.

####Travel cost and time (one direction)

Approx journey time: 45-60 mins.

Approx cost: £1.50

###Travelling By Bus
A single bus journey takes me from Macclesfield town centre to Stockport town centre. The journey takes 1hr 5 mins, plus a ten minute walk to Macclesfield . However, to reach my office, I still have another two mile journey at the other end, on a second bus. This takes the total journey time to over 2 hours (one way).

The travel costs are quite good. A weekly travel-card is £14 for 7 days travel.

But Macclesfield is in the county of Cheshire, and Stockport is in the county of Greater Manchester, and that’s where the problems begin. Because I travel across two counties, I have to deal with two independent travel budgets. The upshot being, that I cannot buy one travel-card for the two journeys. So, it’s another £9.50 for the second bus journey.

####Travel cost and time (one direction)

Approx journey time: 125 mins.

Approx cost: £2.35

###Travelling by Train
Train travel shouldn’t be too difficult. Macclesfield is on the main inter-city line from Manchester to London, stopping at Stockport in-between. To supplement the inter-city route, there are also local trains. Travel time is quick, ranging form 12 minutes to 23 minutes.

The cost isn’t so pretty though costing £35.60 for the week. And like the bus option, I still need to get form Stockport town centre to work, so that’s another £9.50 and another 45 minutes travel time.

####Travel cost and time (one direction)

Approx journey time: 70 mins.

Approx cost: £4.50

###Travelling by Train and Bike
The obvious option is train and bike. This removes the issue of getting a bus at the other end of my journey. Plus it keeps me fit. Travel time wold be reduced, as would the cost - though £7 for two 20 minutes journeys is still bloody expensive.

The key question is - can I take a bike on the train? Thankfully the answer is yes… sort of.

Both Virgin Trains, who run the inter-city trains, and Northern trains do have cycle policies, but they’re fairly restrictive. Virgin trains require compulsory reservation and allow only 4 cycles per train. So if 4 people form London decide to bring their bikes up, I’m stuffed. Plus they have restrictions at peak times. I’ve been on the train, and it is packed to the rafters - people sitting in corridors etc. so I’m not confident it is a viable regular solution. The gentleman I spoke to at National Rail Enquiries tended to agree.

Northern trains don’t require reservation, but they only allow 2 cycles per train. The trains run every 15-20 minutes, so it is a possibility.

####Travel cost and time (one direction)

Approx journey time: 20 mins.

Approx cost: £3.55

###Summary
I have in my hand a leaflet from National Rail that reads:

National Rail encourages the integrated use of cycles on trains

My arse! 2 bike spaces on a train cannot be described as encouraging!

Perhaps I’m being a little unfair. All train operators do now allow passengers to carry a folding bicycle on board. This is a positive gesture. Though I find it hard to imagine them refusing a passenger. It’s no different to a pram, or suitcase. That said, some train will only allow folding bikes on board if they can be stowed safely. Right. Well, next time you’re on a Virgin train, see if you there is anywhere to store luggage safely!

National Rail seems to be plugging Brompton bicycles as the folding bike of choice. Well, they’re priced between £380 and £1,000, so this is not an option. I have a perfectly good bike, with BIG wheels.

Well, I think I’ll give it a go on Northern Rail. Hopefully, no one else wants to get fit and reduce their carbon footprint.

This year’s Summer hols were close to home. We live a mere 40 or so miles from the Welsh border, so we thought it about time we learned a bit more about our neighbours. ore specifically, we went to Cardigan, near Pembrokeshire.

Now 40 miles may not seem far, but you certainly know you’ve entered another country. Aside from the fact that we didn’t come across a set of traffic lights all week (believe me, this is very welcome on
vacation), the signposts are in a different language - a language that seems to have no obvious derivation, and is completely devoid of vowels!

I’d love to have grown up watching Countdown on C4 Wales - I’ll have a consonant please; and another consonant; and another consonant…

The Welsh countryside is pretty amazing, with Snowdonia on the one side, and a beautiful coastline on the other. I think the reason that I enjoyed it so much was because it was the first time I’d been back
in the ocean since leaving Oz. I immediately decided that I want to live there, though GastroGrrl assures me that I say this about everywhere we go that is not near Manchester! (except London, of
course). The other reason I liked it was because it stopped raining!

Highlights for me were swimming, laying on a beach, seeing dolphins, windsurfing, eating and drinking. Perfect!

The holiday was topped off by a visit to the highly-rated National Botanic Gardens of Wales, and a visit to our lovely friends Sam, Huw and Gethin in Cardiff.

Now , I just need to work out how to get Nat to move to Wales with me..

Well, it’s taken some time, but I’ve finally got some of my travel photos up on the net. Actually, just photos of Children of Asia so far. Enjoy

If someone were to ask me what the highlight of my trip was, the answer would be easy. I saw some amazing sights on my travels: many I shall never forget. But I witnessed one spectacle that I shall always remember. It was an event I doubt shall ever be repeated. It was, of course, the European Championship final. My last night in Vietnam, was spent in a small bar in Hanoi with a crowd of Westerners. The bar stayed open until 5am. The bar staff were bemused - the sight of grown men cursing, cheering, crying, singing - all over a game of football. Definitely a night to remember. With a smile from ear to ear, I eventually returned to my hotel; tired, hoarse and soaked in sweat. I had only one hour’s sleep before departing to the airport to fly to Phnom Penh.

The last part of my journey took me through the Kingdom of Cambodia - a country rich with historical temples; a nation poor poor beyond reason. My intention was to visit the Angkor Temples and to learn about the history of Pol Pot and the Khmer Rouge. I did not expect to also be confronted by the aftermath of this brutal regime and it’s preceding tumultuous history.

For the first time in it’s recent history, the country is experiencing a time of peace. Whilst under French rule during the nineteenth century, Cambodia was invaded by Japan during the second World War. Following the war it struggled for independence from France, whilst also finding itself drawn into the Vietnam War. In 1975, the country then came under the control of the Communist, Khmer Rouge regime. Pol Pot’s extreme agrarian reforms soon turned to mass genocide, resulting in the deaths of almost 3 million people; one quarter of the population. In 1978, Vietnam finally intervened, driving the Khmer Rouge into the countryside. They remained for a further 10 years whilst a protracted civil war continued, until 1993 when the UN finally managed to restore calm in the country. The Khmer Rouge finally surrendered in 1999 after the death of Pol Pot.

Whilst most countries have more than recovered from the second World War through reconstruction, Cambodia has continually suffered for an extraordinary length of time. It is only now beginning to rebuild the nation. The local Khmer that I spoke to are positive, yet realistic. Our guides spoke frankly of the situation. All have been closely affected. All have lost family. They know that it will take time and they are cognisant of the many issues that they must address. Yet they are remarkably forgiving. This is a country where members of the Khmer Rouge are still represented in the government, and where it is likely that one’s neighbours, and even one’s relatives fought each other during the civil war.

We visited the famous killing fields on the outskirts of Phnom Penh - a site where a number of mass graves were discovered. Some graves are still to be excavated, whilst most remain as a stark reminder of the scale of the atrocities. The memorial - a large glass tower filled with human skulls - is simple and shocking. Whilst the graves are now mostly empty, the wet season annually churns the surrounding earth. As a result, when we walked the grounds, we found ourselves walking on human bones at every step. It was a somber experience. The site we visited was just one of over 500 such killing fields dotted throughout the country.

More emotional than the killing fields, was the preceding trip to Ponhea Yat High School on the edge of the city. The school, more commonly known as Toul Sleng prison, or S-21, was used by the Khmer Rouge to interrogate and torture prisoners before sending them to the killing fields. It was hard to hold back the tears as our guide explained how the Khmer Rouge systematically tortured their people. Our guide lost his father and two sibling during this reign of terror. He is the same age as me.

By day we learned about the history of Cambodia; by night we learned about the present problems, and how they are being addressed. We visited a great restaurant called Friends, part of a fantastic project called Mith Samlanh that provides hope for the many street children in Cambodia. The restaurant trains the kids so that they can eventually move on into the hospitality trade. Fifty per-cent of the population are under the age of seventeen. Many are orphans, others tend to sick family; sick from poor diet or quite likely HIV/AIDS. Children are uneducated, sexually exploited and drug dependency is extremely high. In Phnom Penh alone, there are over 10,000 children living or working the streets, and many more are arriving from the rural areas on a daily basis. The project trains the kids in a number of vocations, as well as providing outreach programs, shelter, vaccinations, education and overall protection for the children.

It was great to eat some tasty, Western food and even more satisfying to see something positive being done in Cambodia. That day, a fellow traveller was the victim of a motorbike bag snatch, which had somewhat dampened our spirits. We were also conscious of the ever-presence of street children trying to sell us postcards and books, or motorbike drivers hassling us for rides as we walked the streets. Rather than witnessing poverty through begging, we were encountering people working (the streets) all day, simply desperate to earn some income.

On the second night, our guide invited us to his house for dinner. This too was an enlightening experience. Apart from sampling some divine local food, we were able to see where the locals live. It is customary for the husband to move into the wife’s family home, hence many families live under one roof. The houses are basic, with the lounge/dining room doubling as a bedroom, and with meals eaten whilst sitting on the floor.

On the ground floor of our host’s house was the grandfather’s room. On our arrival we were immediately led into this room, as it also doubles as an informal English class for local children, many of whom cannot afford to go to school. Though schooling is free, the poverty-driven corruption that is ingrained into Cambodian society requires the children to pay money on a daily basis to the teacher. Hence, this school has been set up by our guide with money donated through the Intrepid foundation. Learning English is considered the best opportunity for the children to find employment.

The children were understandably excited to meet us. Being white, English-speaking and adorned with our ubiquitous digital cameras, we were soon conversing, reading, playing and photographing them before being dragged apart so that we could eat dinner.

During dinner, our guide gave us an insight into his daily life, which is typical of many Khmer people. He spoke of the financial hardships and of the corruption. Whilst he is primarily employed by Intrepid Travel, when there are no groups touring, he reverts back to his previous job of driving a taxi, and like many of the taxi and motorbike drivers, he often sleeps outside the hotels in the hope of catching the attention of tourists as they depart in the early morning. A recent victim of a motorbike accident which also involved his daughter, our guide explained how it was first necessary to pay/bribe police and then later, doctors and nurses to receive medical treatment. Further payments were also required to pay for the medication. The country is corrupt beyond belief, and there is a huge divide in the society most evidenced by the occasional appearance of large, air-conditioned 4-wheel drive cars alongside the more common motorbike. This is a country who’s Government comprises no less than 7 deputy prime-ministers,135 secretaries of state and 146 undersecretaries of state!

Whilst our guide works in tourism and as a taxi driver, his wife works at one of the larger garment factories now famed for supplying large brands such as Nike and Gap. Interestingly, it was explained that the successful campaigns in recent years by Western consumers against the perceived sweatshop conditions, might mean that the factories will close. Inevitably, this will lead to many job losses, and more worryingly some of the girls may return to the sex trades from which they had escaped.

In all, the visit to Phnom Penh was a culture shock; a shock to the senses and emotions. But it was also quite uplifting to see first hand, how individuals are striving for a better life and purpose. They were wonderfully warm and open to us tourists; their livelihood.

Next stop was Siem Reap, a short flight from Phnom Penh, to visit the UNESCO World Heritage listed Angkor temples, and damn impressive they are. The site consists of over 100 temples built by Khmer civilisations between 800 and 1,000 years ago. The site is massive - some temples are 40km apart. One of the more famous sites, Angkor Thom, is essentially a small, walled city comprising the magnificent Bayon temple at it’s centre surrounded by terraces, galleries of bas-relief and ornate gateways to the complex.

The temples are either Bhuddist, Hindu, or a mix of the two, depending on the accepted religious thoughts at the time of building. Some were built quickly - perhaps 30-40 years in construction; others are more elaborate, and took much longer. A common theme amongst many of the sites, best illustrated by Angkor Wat, is for the temple to be central to the site, depicting the mythical mountain of Meru, and for the surrounding moat to represent the divide between heaven and earth.

The most famous site, Angkor Wat, is impressive in its layout and sheer size. Occupying an area of 500 acres, with a stone causeway stretching over the 200 metre wide moat through the main gateway to the temple, the perimeter walls stretch more than 5 kilometres. The temple comprises 5 towers over 200 metres high. There are lakes in front of the temple that provide beautiful reflections, and balance to the architecture. It’s big. It’s impressive. And that’s just from a distance.

Close up, the temple is equally as impressive. Aside from the stone terraces, carvings of lion’s heads and serpents, the bas-relief stone carvings blow you away - 1,200 square metres of stone carvings depicting Bhuddist stories in exquisite detail.

Of the many other sites that we visited, one that stood out for it’s uniqueness was Ta Prohm. Surrounded by jungle, the temple has been left victim to the forces of nature: huge fig and banyan trees have set root amongst the temple walls, their roots intertwining with the stone structures to provide an eery scene. Ta Prohm is unsurprisingly famous for one other reason: it was used as the setting for the film of the game of the adventures of the pneumatic Lara Croft, in Tomb Raider.

Moats and ponds play a central part in much of the architecture, and the sites would have looked more impressive after the wet season. However, this so also the busiest time for tourists, and I am reliably informed that most views and photo opportunities are spoiled by cliques of Korean tourists and the clicks of Korean cameras. Whilst it was nice to visit out of the tourist season, this did mean that we were more than easy targets for the numerous street children that hawk their wares at every opportunity. It became annoying at times, but the kids could also be good fun and impressed us all with their ability to converse in many languages as well as inform us of the capital city and population of our respective mother countries. The kids were ever present. Our evenings were spent at the local bars in town, where the drinks are ridiculously cheap, and where I learned all about drinking cocktails from the girls on the trip. Meanwhile, outside the bars, the kids constantly entertained us by dancing and monkeying around.

One evening we visited a cello performance by Dr. Beat Richner at the Kantha Bopha Children’s Hospital. He is the founder of this, and two other, hospitals that treat patients free of charge. The performance was mixed with facts and anecdotes about the health care crisis in Cambodia, and ended with a plea for donations - for both money and blood. It is estimated that these hospitals save over 3,000 children’s lives per month (read that sentence again). Dr. Richner also gave an insight into how WHO and UNICEF policy is, in his opinion, failing 3rd world nations such as Cambodia.

Before finally departing Siem Reap, we stopped by the Cambodia Landmine Museum, a simple collection of huts housing a wide variety of landmines collected throughout the region. The huts are also home to a number of children affected by the landmines. We were given a talk by one of these children. Now an amputee who lost two sibling when he stood on a mine eight years ago, he later lost a cousin the same way. He is only eighteen years old, but spoke quite candidly about his experience and demonstrated how to diffuse the various types of mines.

The museum is run by Aki Ra, an ex-child Cambodian soldier (who foughting both for, and against, the Khmer Rouge during his childhood). He has personally cleared over 6,000 landmines. His life story is remarkable and a real insight to just how torn apart the country has been, but yet another example of how the local Khmer are attempting to overcome their past.

Cambodia, and indeed the whole trip, came to an end far too quickly. Five days in Cambodia and I was already on a bus heading towards the Thai Border. The road was bumpy; the journey long; the border crossing muddy. Thirteen hours later we were back in Bangkok preparing are onward travels an saying our last goodbyes.

From Bangkok to Manchester, with a brief visit to Kuala Lumpur on the way, I’m now back in England for the first time properly in over five years. I still feel like a tourist. I can’t remember how to get to places; I’m finally enjoying a decent pint; I don’t know how much things cost; the supermarkets are incredible but expensive; everything is wrapped in plastic; I don’t know the names of TV programmes nor bands played on the radio. The weekend newspapers are as good as ever, still taking me a week to read. Best of all, I’ve discovered the new craze that’s swept the nation: Sudoku.

I really can’t complain. Life still continues to be one long holiday!

Sin Choi! Greetings from Vietnam - the land of the motorbike. They are absolutely everywhere, and I’ve grown to love them!

Last week we finally departed Laos, a country which I really fell for and am certain that I will revisit. Our entry into Vietnam was at a border crossing in the North. We spent our final night in Laos as guests of a border village. As is exceedingly common, the village is situated on a river. The locals utilise the river for fishing, bathing and washing.

We arrived in the late afternoon, and as the day cooled, we embarked upon a short river trip aboard the local long boats… made from old B52 missiles! Laos was the most heavily carpet-bombed country in the Vietnam War. Over 2 million tonnes of missiles were dropped. Everyone now seems to own their own B52 boat.

On completion of the boat ride we bathed with the local children in the river, jumping off the river banks, splashing the kids and swimming with them. The beauty of playing with children is that it is easy to transcend any language barrier. They love having their photos taken, (and seeing the immediate results), playing tag or simply mimicking you. Much of the rest of the evening was also spent entertaining the children. Or were they entertaining us?

The next morning we crossed the border at Lak Xao and drove to Ninh Binh in readiness for the following day’s departure to Halong Bay. Along the way, we saw limestone pinnacles not too dissimilar to those that I saw in Borneo. Though, this time, we didn’t need to traipse through the jungle to see them.

Halong Bay (UNESCO World Heritage listed) is a truly remarkable site. Protruding from the sea are over one thousand rock formations, hundreds of feet high. Travelling by boat amongst the rocks was somewhat surreal, with formations spanning the horizon in every direction.

We had our own boat, and spent the night moored in the bay, eating good food, drinking, swimming and waiting for dawn’s early rise. The next morning, having awoken on deck, and refreshed by a quick swim, we returned to the mainland to head towards Hanoi.

The first thing that hits you (literally,if you’re not careful) about Hanoi are the motorbikes. Vietnam has made a very quick transition from push-bikes to motorbikes. God help them when they transcend to cars. There’s just not enough room. The roads are full of motorbikes; the pavements are full of parked motorbikes - so much so that pedestrians are forced to walk on the road; when there’s no space on the pavement, bikes are parked in the shops - even when they are open for trading!

The first activity on our arrival in Hanoi, was to receive instructions on how to cross the road. Officially, bikes travel on the right-hand side of the road, but it is not uncommon for them to ride into the oncoming traffic. Bikes pull out of side-roads without checking for oncoming traffic. Similarly, pedestrians cross in front of the endless stream of bikes and they simply steer round you. It’s all a bit disconcerting at first, yet there is a method to the madness that does seem to work. They also drive quite slowly which helps.

Some interesting sites can be seen on a motorbike too. It’s not uncommon to see a whole family on one bike, including babies - normally perched in front of the driver, and often wearing masks due to the pollution. On our travels we have seen plenty of pigs bound to the back of a bike - still alive! The most outrageous site I have seen is two guys holding a large pane of glass! Motorbike taxis are also the best way to get around town. Simply agree a price, hop on as pillion and say a prayer.

It is difficult to find tranquility in Hanoi. The streets are packed with people, bikes and shops -mainly catering to tourists. The French Quarter is quieter and a great place to escape to, with great coffee shops, restaurants and cool art shops. The city is awash with counterfeit goods. I was surprised to see that even books are copied. Most cafes stock all the modern classics - so long as you don’t mind photocopied pictures on the cover.

During our stay, we visited the famous Vietnamese water puppets show - originally created hundreds of years ago to entertain workers in the rice fields. The puppets appear on water, operated from behind a curtain. All quite amusing, even though we could not understand a word of what was being said.

The other highlight of our stay in Hanoi, was a visit to Uncle Ho’s Mausoleum. Ho Chi Min is much revered in Vietnam: so much so that his body is kept on display for the public to pay their respects. Evidently, they didn’t respect him enough to grant him his final wish - to be cremated. Visiting the mausoleum is a serious affair. The public queue daily to enter. No photos, hats, sunglasses or handbags are permitted. There are metal detectors to pass through, and guards on every corner. A strange experience, but Uncle Ho did look rather peaceful.

A few days in Hanoi was enough,and the heat was oppressive. So off we set to the much more peaceful city of Hue. It took 13 hours on the overnight train, but was well worth it. Hue is also UNESCO World Heritage listed, due to it’s historical sites - though a great deal of damage was caused when attacked by both the Japanese and the Americans. The city comprises a citadel that, in its day, would have been extremely impressive. Further along the Perfume River are the impressive Royal Tombs and Pagodas belonging to the Nguyen dynasty - and their many concubines.

Some of the sites are situated a fair distance from each other, so our group elected to spend the day touring them by motorbike. Great fun. We had a convoy of riders take us from site to site. We also visited a most peaceful Buddhist monastery, and stopped at a Buddhist nunnery for a great vegetarian lunch. The drivers took us down the back alleys of villages, through paddy fields, local markets and along river banks. A great way to get a feel for how and where the locals live: though at times it did feel as though we were some Hell’s Angel chapter terrorising the villages. That said, the village kids seemed to love us. As soon as they heard our bikes, they ran out to greet us, shouting hello and high-fiving us as we drove by.

I would have liked to have stayed in Hue for a few days longer, but I’m on a whirlwind trip, and a few days later found myself in the equally impressive city of Hoi An also UNESCO World Heritage listed, though this time due to the fact that it remained unaffected by war damage, and stands as a beautiful example of the old colonial French architecture. Old wooden shop facades run the length of the three main streets along a quiet river. There is even a 17th century Japanese wooden bridge spanning the river. The town centre is charming, as are the locals. But the town is extremely touristy. All the shops cater to visitors - selling art, silk material and most importantly, tailor-made suits. There are also some great cafes and bars, which we made very good use of.

As is obligatory, I decided to have a few suits made. A great, once in a life-time experience - being pampered by your personal tailor; choosing designs from catalogues and materials from swatches; returning for numerous fittings, and then seeing the final product - all within 24 hours!

After two days it was time to leave Hoi An, which was probably a good thing as my credit card was wearing out. The Vietnam tour is too quickly coming to an end. I am currently in Ho Chi Min city (formerly Saigon). The city is as busy as Hanoi, but with wider roads, so it seems less hectic. Motorbikes are still everywhere. The city does not have too much to offer the tourist, though itt is certainly the smartest city I’ve visited, with large hotel chains and smart shops.

There is a rather sobering War Remnants Museum that catalogues the Second Indochina War (Vietnam War). The photos are extremely graphic. The affects of the war are made all the more apparent by the disfigured street beggars nearby, who are victims of either Napalm or Dioxin.

Tomorrow we leave for Cambodia, which should be an ever more sobering experience, as our first stop is the Killing Fields.

But that’s tomorrow. Tonight, my mission is to find a bar showing the European Cup Final (actually on in the early hours of tomorrow morning). Think I might go off now and buy myself a fake Liverpool top just for the occasion!

Bangkok is but a distant memory. Sorry to disappoint you all; contrary to my emails, I never did get a tattoo, nose-piercing nor hair extensions: Its probably more alternative to dress normally. Though I did get to see Liverpool stuff Chelsea. The commentary was all in Thai, but from what I gather the ball was definitely over the line.

Having well and truly done Bangkok - it’s temples, its massages, its pollution - we escaped on the overnight train to the northern city of Chiang Mai, the second largest city in Thailand. The journey took fourteen hours. I, and some fellow travellers spent the early part of the evening playing cards in the buffet car until we were threatened with imprisonment unless we ordered some food. Otherwise the journey was fairly uneventful.

Stumbling off the train the next morning, we were whisked to our hotel to freshen up after which I began a half-day Thai cookery class. It was fantastic. First we visited the local markets to buy our ingredients and then commenced the class where we learned how to cook spring rolls, tom yum soup, green curry and pad thai. Of course we were also obliged to eat everything we ate which was the best part.

The class was soon followed by a much needed walk up to the Doi Suthep temple to hear the Buddhist monks chant, followed by dinner at the famous Cabbages and Condoms restaurant.

The next morning we continued North to Huay Xia to cross the border into Laos. The experience was a little different to that of normal international travel. We had to first pass through passport control in Thailand, then take a short boat ride across the river, and finally pass through custom controls into Laos.

Once these obligations were completed, we had to convert our money into Lao kip, which is always fun. The current rate of exchange is approximately 10,000 kip to one $US. Having changed US$50, I couldn’t fit the kip notes into my wallet! It is really difficult to get ones head round the currency. Paying for group bills in restaurants can require someone to collect in excess of 800,000 kip. Thankfully, much of the merchandise is advertised in US dollars. It is normal practice to barter on Laos. This is always exciting, until one realises that knocking 5,000 kip off the cost is merely a 50 cent saving.

In Laos, we met our boat that was to take us down the Mekong Delta for the next two days. The Mekong is a wide river surrounded by low hills on both sides and occasional outcrops of rocks from within the river. The height of the river changes immensely during the wet season, and is quite low at present. Our boat was a slow, simple diesel-powered affair. The alternative is to take ones life in ones own hands and step aboard a speedboat - notoriously dangerous boats that look similar to Donald Campbell’s Bluebird. The serenity of our river trip was occasionally disturbed by the sound of these boats approaching; the sight of the passengers all wearing crash helmets enough to put me off!

All along the river are various farming communities. We saw locals fishing in the river and elephants being ridden along the river banks, but did not see much else as it was cloudy and rainy. Though this did keep the temperature pleasant.

We spent the night in a small town called Pat Beng on the river, got caught in a torrential downpour but had my first taste of the much famed Laos beer, appropriately named BeerLaos. It really is very good. All the tourist shops sell BeerLaos t-shirts, and the logo is so ubiquitous, I think it should replace the national flag.

The next day we continued our trip along the Mekong towards Luang Phrabang. The weather improved to reveal beautiful hillside and some rainforest. We stopped at a local village to look around. We were immediately surrounded by children trying to sell us embroidered skirts. Apparently, a girls ability to embroider vastly improves her marriage prospects. Once the digital cameras came out all hell broke loose. The kids know well enough that they can see the results of the photos immediately. That said, the children are divine and always make a great subject, We all got an ample quota of photographs before re-boarding the boat.

Finally we made it to Luang Phrabang, but not before stopping at the Pak Ou caves - a graveyard for unused Buddha images dating back hundreds of years.

Luang Phrabang is the most amazing city, and it is easy to understand why it has achieved UNESCO World Heritage Status. With a population of 16,000 it has a nice and relaxed pace. The architecture is a mix of French Imperial, intermingled with ancient Buddhist temples. The main mode of traffic is motorbike, but no one is ever in a hurry. Bikes ride casually alongside each other, the drivers deep in conversation and their pillion-passengers travelling side-saddle. Monks walk the streets adorned in their ubiquitous orange robes and occasional matching sunbrellas. The sidewalks are lined with french-style bistro cafes along with their original imperial style furniture. In contrast, there are many modern cafes and shops; their walls adorned with fashionable modern art and the latest chilled beats playing on the stereo. And then there are the people. As with the rest of East-Asia, they are genuinely friendly and courteous. But what sets the Laos people apart is their wonderful dress sense - perhaps a carry-over from their days under French rule. The girls wear beautiful, long dresses, even the children. Everyone looks quite smart. If you’re looking for urban chic, then visit Laos.

We spent a couple of days relaxing in Luang Phrabang visiting temples, the museum, nightmarkets and shops. As this was the original capital of Laos there is a great deal to see historically, including a Buddha image dating back to 1AD - a gift from Sri Lanka.

Our accommodation was lovely too. The resort comprised bamboo/wooden villas each with their own porch on which breakfast was served daily. Our guides were good fun, and they took us on a morning treck through local villages to some wonderful waterfalls and natural swimming pools to cool down from the heat. We also got to meet an orphan tiger and bears rescued from captivity. The evenings were spent improving our appreciation of BeerLao.

The shopping here was good too. Lao is famous for it’s weaving. Luang Phrabang is famous for its silk. Inevitably, there are some great silk weaving available - some traditional others quite modern.

On the final morning we awoke early to witness locals giving alms to the monks. At six am, a procession of a hundred-or-so monks walk single file down the main street, with their food containers in hand. Locals then donate food so that they can continue their studies. It’s quite a humbling site.

It is easy to forget that Laos is a Socialist country. There exists some form of free-market economy within the city. There are no government political posters nor statues in sight.. and everyone seems so genuinely content and happy. After two days, we said our sad farewell to Luang Phrabang to continue our travels to the new capital - Vientiane.

Vientiane has less charm than it’s former capital, but it is interesting enough to warrant a visit. There is less evidence of the French Imperial presence though there is a pale imitation of the Arch de Triumph to commemorate the country’s liberation. The arch is constructed from concrete donated by the United State with the intention of building an airport runway. From afar it looks OK. However, as the official tourism plaque reads close up, it is a concrete monster.

Of other interest in the city is the National Museum which details the history of Laos and it’s successful struggles against French Imperialists, Japanese Fascists and U.S Imperialist puppets.

Today was hot - 33 degrees Celsius. That’s hotter than Kylie Minogue’s underwear. And it was almost as humid. Regardless, myself and a French opted to hire push-bikes to see the town. Great fun. They drive on the wrong side of the road here, and the Highway Code is rarely adhered to. It is not uncommon to see a father riding with his two child passengers, no helmets and a mobile phone cradled against his ear. Negotiating roundabouts was hairy. At times there were motorbikes travelling towards me on my side of the road. Thankfully, there were no casualties. That said, no one here appears to be in a hurry, so accidents seem less likely to happen.

Tomorrow we begin our journey towards the Vietnamese border, entering Vietnam at Ninh Binh. But first we stay the night as guests of a local Loas village which should be a great experience, and will no doubt provide endless opportunities to photograph the local kids. Actually, I’m convinced that the inhabitants of these villages assume that all Westerners constantly walk around with cameras round their necks, obsessively recording every moment. I doubt they’ve met a Farang (foreigner)who does not possess a camera.

Well, I’ve been in this internet cafe far too long. It’s no doubt going to cost me tens of thousands of kip, so I best be off.

Until Vietnam.. Laigon (good bye)

After one month, I’ve finally left Malaysia and am now trying to adjust to the utter madness that is Bangkok. I imagine many of you reading this have visited the city. It’s my first visit, and I don’t think I was entirely prepared. Having just left an island whose circumference can be walked in 15 minutes, and having stayed in cities in Borneo that are essentially one, long main street, I’ve become accustomed to getting my bearings when I first arrive, by going for a quick walk around town. Not possible in Bangkok. It’s one massive sprawl, and every street is as wide and busy as a motorway. It’s necessary to take taxis or tuk-tuks to get anywhere. Every purchase requires bartering; everyone wants to sell you a tour, or worse some time with a lady of leisure. It’s impossible to escape the incessant traffic. Thank god I went diving before visiting here, else my lung capacity might have halved!

Today I visited the Grand Palace and Wat Phra Kaeo temple. They both really are impressive, particulary the buddha-shaped topiary. Tonight I plan to head into ChinaTown and check out the big Buddha. Khao San Road is a distinct reminder that I’m no longer off the beaten track for backpackers. If I were younger, I might stay here to watch Liverpool beat Chelsea in the early hours. Being an old fart, I’ll probably watch it in my hotel room with just the minibar for company.

My final week in Borneo was spent scuba diving on and around the island of Sipidan. I spent three nights on the luxurious resort of Kapali; an entirely wooden structure built over a small reef. The water was crystal clear, the sandy bottom littered with starfish. Flute fish glide by and occasionally jump from the water, Lionfish idle past. And all this just from the resort. The main diving was on the reef surrounding the island of Sipidan. Two dives in the morning, followed by a third, afternoon dive nearer the resort. The food was excellent and my co-divers were a lovely bunch. For the first time on my travels, I was in the minority, being an English speaker, which was strange.

I really felt like I was in paradise… until four soldiers walked past in full military wardrobe; automatic rifles flung over their shoulders! All the resorts in the area are patrolled by the military. The islands lie very close to the Philippine border, and in the year 2000, twenty divers were taken hostage by a Muslim fundamentalist terrorist group.

For my final three days I moved to the nearby island of Mabul, famed for it’s macrolife. The resort was less luxurious than Kapali, but perfectly adequate. I also met a friendly crowd to socialise with in the evenings. All dive resorts follow the same ritual in the evening. Once you’ve showered and cleaned up from a hard day’s diving, you congregate over food and drink along with dive logbooks and fish identification books. Between you all, you try to remember what you saw, and then identify it in the books. It’s always good fun, and there’s always someone who has seen something a bit out of the ordinary. After three dives and a couple of beers, it’s generally an early night in preparation for the next morning.

Sipidan island is home to a wide array of pelagic fish as well as a world-renowned selection of macrolife. At the beginning of this year, the Malaysian Government prohibited anyone access to the island itself to protect the marine life. As a result, the half a dozen resorts that were on the island have now relocated to nearby islands. This is a good move by the Malaysian government, though there are suspicions that the real reason for controlling the island is that there may be oil reserves nearby.

The diving was awesome. Every dive would include numerous sightings of both turtles (some giant) and reef sharks. Sadly, I never saw any Whale Sharks nor any Hammerheads. I really learned to appreciate the macrolife too, be it colourful nudibranches (sea slugs), shrimps or mandarin fish. The coral is not what is used to be (perhaps due to over tourism, perhaps due to El Nino), but it is good non-the-less. Nearby, poor fishermen resort to dynamite fishing, which is a real shame as it destroys huge tracts of reef.

On the final day, our dive boat was escorted by flying fish, which was an awesome sight. The fish jump out of the water, spread their wings and fly alongside the boat for about five seconds! remarkable. The dive holiday went far too quickly. They always do.

I have another two days in Bangkok before heading North to Chiang Mai, as I commence my next adventure through Indo-China. I’ve not really taken to Bangkok, and will be happy to leave. Though the temples are stunning, the city is busy, polluted and full of travellers. The locals cater almost entirely for tourists. After all, this is the gateway to South-East Asia. Perhaps it’s a good preparation for when I hit Ho Chi Min City. Can the traffic in Vietnam really be any worse than this?

Kuching is the most modern of the cities I have visited. It caters to tourists, and I imagine it is similar to Peninsular Malaysia, KL in particular. I’ve seen more oran putti (white people) here than on any other part of the trip. That said, we are still a novelty. Strangers say hello and shopkeepers ask where you are from. I think that they want to practice their English, but also they seem to be proud of their country and eager to act as ambassadors to tourists. The girls in the shops get the giggles when they serve you, which is flattering. Last night, being the final night of the trip, we spent the evening in a local bar and hit the dance floor (a small space between the pool table and the toilet). The local girls were fascinated by the wester girl’s hair, skin and figures. The local boys were eager to dance with me.. I am assured that this is quite common. Kuchin translates as cat which is a rather odd name for a city and the Chinese influence here is extremely strong. The Chinese seem extremely friendly and well integrated. It’s sad that they are the victim of racist Government policy; Malaysian’s receive preferential treatment over Chinese (business grants, tax breaks etc.) in an attempt to redress the balance of business ownership. For unknown reasons, there is an obsession with collecting brass cannons and kettles as a sign of one’s status.

The final part of my trip was spent staying with a small Iban community. After 4 hours travelling by road, the group transferred to a long boat to complete the journey by river as the village is not accessible by any other mode of transport. We travelled for 45 minutes along the river, through jungle until we reached our destination.

The community live in a traditional long house. The house is built on stilts and comprises one long enclosed balcony running the entire length. Off the balcony are a number of rooms: one for each family. The family sleep, cook and eat in their room. The room is extremely basic - an open fire is used for cooking, water is pumped up fro the river, the family sleep on the floor and the electricity is turned on only at night.

The balcony space in front of the room belongs to the family too. They lay out their rattan mats and socialise with the other families on the balcony.

The Iban life is a simple one. They hunt and grow crops to either eat or sell. They also tap rubber and sell the latex. The Iban are obsessed with washing. Bathing is a social ritual and it is common to see a family down at the river lathered up or washing clothes. The children spend a great deal of time playing in the water too.

We spent two night without hosts and got a real feel for their simple way of life. They are poor, but they are happy too. We also got a feel for their culture. They are animist and believe in spirits. On out first night we were obliged to drink Tuak; a rice wine. Prior to the proceedings, the chief gave some wine to the long house to keep bad spirits away. Once this has been done we were given a bottle of wine and a cup. We were obliged to offer our hosts some wine, and they would reciprocate. It all got a bit messy and ended up in drinking games, traditional dancing and us white people making fools of ourselves, but it was great fun.

The children were adorable and the adults friendly and inquisitive. It was a lovely experience. Sadly, my adventure has now come to an end. I’m now gearing up for my dive trip next week, after which I head off to Bangkok to begin my next adventure.

Stay tuned